Girls' Night Out

Date: March 23, 2003
Setting: Westport, CT

Bulemia Bear (KIA) - Sarah (lionlady)
Feminazi Bear (KIA) - Brynn (brynndragon)
Heavy Flow Day Bear (KIA) - Melissa (creatrixx)
"Not Tonight I have a Headache" Bear - Cat (k1ttycat)
Oubliette Bear - C (telkella)
Poor Self Image Bear - Brittany (mentia999)

Not only did they defeat Martha Stewarthulhu and her army of plant-zombie housewives, they did so with the style and panache I've come to expect from these lovely ladies. I only got pelted with Swedish fish once... though I feared for my manhood and sanity on more than one occasion. I dare say, the world of Care Bears: Call of Cthulhu will never be the same.

If I max out my VISA, I'll have to use my Care Bear Mastercard.

No, Heavy Flow Day Bear is not standing on my shoulders!

Flowering Pants?!?

It's not labelled and it's not decorated... that means there must be men around.

Fucking ceramic frog! I mean... how cute.

I died free! Stupid... but free.

Synopsis

While digging for a new swimming pool at Martha Stewart's home in Westport, workers unearth a strange cave containing strange carniverous flowers by a sunless lake. Pollen is released but doesn not affect the men. One enterprising worker sells a few of the unusual flowers to a local florist. Pollen infects the women of Westport, growing tendrils through their brains and turning them into mindless zombie drones. Martha Stewart is infected by the Queen organism. the primary purpose of the hive is to establish a colony on Earth and take over the ecosphere. All of the men are turned into fertilizer to feed the flowers. As a result of the blending of Martha Stewart with the Queen, the drones develop a secondary objective which basically boils down to turning Westport in "Martha's Kitchen Craft Hell".