Rules

GURPS1/3 Care Bears: Call of Cthulhu

You are a Care Bear Second Cousin (AKA Care Less Bear). You are basically a Care Bear reject. It's not that you don't Care. You care quite a bit, but not necessarily about the sort of things they can show on an early morning cartoon. You join the ranks of such ill fated Bears as Myopia Bear, Lobotomy Bear, and "I'm Not Wearing Any Pants" Bear. You've heard the names of Death of a 1000 Paper Cuts Bear, and Rapid Exothermic Reaction Bear. There's even been a Dead Bear, a Francophile Bear, and for some ungodly reason, a Candy(-Ass) Bear.

Now is your chance. You can save the World. Rise up and show everyone what it means to be a Care Bear Second Cousin! It's time for the misfits to win, or die trying.

GCB:COC is simple. The character creation system is so asininely simple that it would be an insult to your intelligence to explain it here. So, here goes. The crux of a Care Bear concept is this:

Care Bear Stare

You have a Care Bear stare. It has three levels of Power, and a personal effect.

  1. Personal Effect: Your Care Bear's basic nature is reflected in their appearance and disposition.
    • For example: Myopia Bear is myopic. He has trouble seeing past his nose. Redneck Bear might have a shotgun. Bondage Bear is skilled with ropes.
  2. Care Bear Stare: The level one stare is minor and can be used with impunity. If you use it too much, you may be penalized, but unless you're being annoying, don't worry about it.
    • Let's say, it makes one person (or unnamable horror) nearsighted temporarily. All the player has to do is say "Myopia Bear Stare!" and it happens.
  3. Care Bear Power Stare: The level two stare has a major game effect. It causes health damage *to you* when you use it, so be careful. To use this power, the player has to say "Care Bear Power Stare!" and it happens.
    • "Myopia Bear Power Stare!". He takes a level of damage and can permanently "blind" an opponent (or perhaps temporarily blind a large group...). YAY! Running away is easier if the Deep Ones can't see you.
  4. Care Bear Death Stare: The third level of stare is the "Care Bear Death Stare" If you use this stare, you die. End of story. Don't use this power unless you absolutely have to, or your S.O. whispers something in your ear about leaving the game for hot monkey love. You have NO idea what your death stare does. You've never used it... duh. If you use it, you'll find out. Curiousity killed the Care Bear.
    • Myopia Bear's Death Stare might be used to permanently blind an elder god, or an entire city of lesser beings.

Stats and Skills

You have 5 stats and 13 points to spend.

  • Strength - How many grenades you can carry.
  • Dexterity - How many grenades you can juggle.
  • Intelligence - Your ability to identify the grenade and its function.
  • Charisma - Your ability to talk the nice, kind grenade out of exploding.
  • Health - Your ability to not die from the resulting explosion.

You may not have a zero in a stat (Unless you are Lobotomy Bear or Dead Bear, which you can't be because someone's already played them). You may not have more than a six in a stat, and only if it makes sense for your Care Bear. (Note: Rolling a six always fails, so scores of 5 and 6 are functionally equivalent). Human average is 3. Care Bear average is 2.

Most of the time, if you suggest a reasonable course of action, it should work. And unreasonable course of action will fail. If dice must be rolled, you roll a D6 and try to get equal to or under your stat. A roll of 1 always succeeds. A roll of 6 always fails. Arbitrary? Sure. But then, you're playing Care Bears: Call of Cthulhu.

Care Bears don't have skills. Heavy Weapons Bear is no more capable of using that rocket launcher than Candy(-Ass) Bear. But, Heavy Weapons Bear might start with one. Care Bears do not have Sanity Points. Deal.

Creating your Bear

Think of a Care Bear Stare and a Cool Care Bear name. Decide what your tummy symbol looks like. Determine what you want your Stare and Power Stare to do. Maybe even suggest a Death Stare. Allocate stat points. Have fun. Try not to die.

Character sheets

Running a Care Bears: Call of Cthulhu Game

The first rule of CBCoC is this: If it's FUNNY, it works. If an in-character action or comment causes you to laugh, the other players to laugh, and/or spectators to laugh, then it should happen. The entire game is a joke. Go with it.

Your job, as a GM, is to tell a good (or bad) Horror story. If you haven't read Lovecraft, do it. If you haven't seen the terrible movies that have been made of his work, watch them. No GM should attempt to run a CBCoC game without a thorough background in horror. Watch the late-night creature features. Don't worry about whether it's "art", even the cheesiest horror movies can keep you up nights. That's the feel you want to go for. Then add Care Bears. The rest should take care of itself.

GM's toolkit

Secondary Senses
Anyone can describe how a scene looks, but in the horror genre, it is essential to employ the secondary senses to create a sense of immersion in the story. Don't hesitate to build suspense even though you're basically playing this game for humor value. Sound, Smell, and Touch become very important. Horror films especially rely on sound to do their work for them. Silence can be funny or scary. A sudden, unexpected noise can jolt. My personal favorite is to use a recurring sound or smell to build suspense. If the zombies are always preceeded by a scuffling noise, or the smell of lilacs, the party learns to fear the scuffling noise and flowers. Use this to your advantage! If the lights go out, all the other senses come into play. Stumbling over a dead companion in the dark is a wonderfully chilling experience, even when you're a Care Bear! (Note: I've never figured out how to use Taste to build horror. It's basically just smell but you have to convince the Bears to lick things. Ewww.)
Juxtaposition
Setting horrific things in a familiar scene is very unsettling, the more innocent the scene, the worse the horror. Blood and guts in a slaughterhouse is gross. Blood and guts in a crib is horrifying.