[Image]The Songs of Amber[Image]

For some reason, Amber brings out the minstrel in us. Below are some classic songs (mostly taken from the beloved Schoolhouse Rock series) which we have..."creatively interpeted" for our amusement. Yes, we do have too much time on our hands!


Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin Get Your Pattern Here!

(To the tune of "Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs Here!)
Hmmmmm... Hmmmmm... Hmmmmm!!! Ready pop? Yep. Ready Unicorn? Ready! Let's go. Let's go! One, two... Dworkin Dworkin Dworkin, get your Pattern here! Dworkin Dworkin Dworkin, got some Pattern here! Come on down to Amber, get the Pattern here! You're going to need it If you want to shift Or even think about it. Dworkin Dworkin Dworkin, get your Pattern here! Got a lot of holly jolly Pattern here! Anything you need And we can make it absolutely clear! The Pattern is reality... That's all it is, and that's actually pretty rare! That modifies a world... Sometimes a world! Sometimes... It modifies the time flow, Or probability.. And so you see that it's positively, very, very, necessary. Dworkin Dworkin Dworkin, get your Pattern here! Father, son and uni' selling Pattern here! Got a lot of Shadows and we make it clear, So come to Dworkin! Hello, folks. This is Dworkin Barimen, saying we have every Shadow in the book, so come on down and look! Hello, folks. Oberon Barimen here. Suppose your house needs painting. How are you going to paint it? That's where Shadow shifting comes in. We can also give you a special Royal Walk or Hellride so you can paint it very neatly or rather sloppily. Hi. Suppose you're going nut-gathering. Your buddy wants to know where and when. Manipulate probablility and tell him. Get your Pattern... Use it with an artifact, it does much more. Icky things from chaos will fall to the floor. Their bodies burn up so there is no messy gore, And so you walk very carefully The Pattern that you use. Use it with your Psyche to know what they did. Where it happened, where they're going, where they've been. Use your Pattern Mastery skills in the end, and even more... How, where, or when, condition or reason... These questions are answered When you use the Pattern... Come and get it! Dworkin Dworkin Dworkin, get your Pattern here! Quickly quickly quickly, get your Pattern here! Slowly surely really, walk your Pattern here! You're going need it If you think it If you shift or change the Shadow with it. Pattern... If it's not Chaos we have it at Dworkin's! Bring along your illegitamate children too, like Dara, Martin and Merlin. We'll fit them out with our blood of Amber attachment, and make perfectly good Amberites out of them! Get your Pattern here! Lots of good tricks at Dworkin's, so come on down! Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin! Pattern deals with probability, place, time... Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin! Conjuring, trump... Father, Son and Uni! Hellrides, Royal Walks! Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin! Enrich your blood with Pattern! Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin! Besides, it's absolutely free! Dworkin, Dworkin, Dworkin! At your service! Indubitably!

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Done by Tom Russell, tick@sidehack.gweep.net

Last modified 07-23-96 by tick@sidehack.gweep.net