At the movies:
Coming SOON to this Theatre...
Experience the *Blood-Chilling* terror of *** Vault of the Mongo Eunuchs ***
And don't miss Bela Lugosi's last role in
*** Twitch of the Flag Burning Witches ***
Guaranteed to Terrify and Amaze!
Introducing this week's page five girl: Gilda. She's from New Hanson, Turkmenistan. You may have seen her on shows like Baywatch and All My Children. The sexy, gorgeous Double D-Cup Brunette plans to someday get a real modelling job someday.
Spewly World News
The actual Weekly World News